When Jesus Pulls Up a Barstool

Content warning:
This post contains some strong language (in the screenplay formatted portion below).

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I recently had the privilege—after 3 years of wanting to—to watch Father Stu. It stars Mark Wahlberg in a true story about a boxer turned Catholic priest. I don’t want to give away too much, but at the end of the movie, my wife and I looked at each other and sat in silence for several minutes. It was a heavy, timely, strangely encouraging film. (At one point, my wife cautioned me that it might be the sort of film that triggers feelings of depression and disability—it didn’t, but she was wise to bring it up.)

Stuart Long was a boxer who then decided to try to be a Hollywood actor. It was while in Hollywood, not reaching his goals, that he met a Catholic woman, started attending church, and ended up getting baptized and confirmed. He was still not making it as an actor, and he found himself in a bar one night (43:57).

Next thing we know, a mysterious man with a scarred face is sitting next to Stu, and we witness the following exchange (44:00–45:33):

STRANGER

You’re getting into the fine print on this way of living, pal.

STU

What you think you know?

STRANGER

I know you got a long, weary road ahead with the headlights dim. You have to learn the hard way how to live in the light.

STU

Why don’t you find someone else who wants to hear your shit?

STRANGER

No one wants to.

STU

No shit. Take a hint.

STRANGER

In my experience, the toughest fights are the only ones worth walking into. You bring a tough guy to his knees, and the first few times he feels shame, rage. Eventually, relief.

STU

Wanna have a big dick contest, bud?

STRANGER

I know how big your dick is, son.

STU

I’d fuck you up if you weren’t fucked up already.

STRANGER

Yeah. Someone beat you to it.

(STU scoffs.)

STRANGER (cont.)

Life’s gonna give you a gutful of reasons to be angry, kid. You only need one to be grateful.

STU

Wow. That is the most fucked up ratio since the number of marshmallows in Lucky Charms.

STRANGER

You ain’t owed nothing. But you’re getting a chance.

(STRANGER Taps table.)

STRANGER (cont.)

Don’t go driving now.

(STRANGER walks away.)

STU (to BARTENDER)

What the fuck was he drinking?

BARTENDER

Water.

Stu then proceeds to keep drinking and goes driving (45:49). He is in a horrible accident and miraculously survives. As a result, he dedicates his life to the priesthood. This leads him into even more battles than the battle for his life post-accident.

Hearing God

There are a lot of things I could talk about as it relates to this movie. The beauty of Catholic theology. Perseverance despite ridiculous odds. Christian politics (as opposed to American government politics). Preaching. Contextualizing the gospel. Swearing (IMDB counts 74 uses of the f-word, though there is a PG-13 version with none). Divine healing or lack thereof.

But what I want to discuss today is how this scene relates to my quest to hear God, to walk intimately with Jesus.

When I was in college, I got it in my head that I should live as if Jesus was across from me when I was at a restaurant alone or elsewhere. A few times I tried carrying on a verbal conversation with him. But I quickly felt awkward and got scared out of doing it.

However, as I’ve continued working on the sequel to Stranded—Soldier—which takes place during my college years, I’ve created a Jesus character who walks along with Jay, even though Jay doesn’t recognize him and is worried he might be the enemy. This fits, because in my college years I was heavily involved in a church that worshipped Jesus as God—up there, highly exalted, too good to walk with us or speak with us apart from the Bible he’d left us—and called internal impressions untrustworthy and potentially demonic. But I get ahead of myself.

The Stranger is Jesus

There are numerous hints throughout the conversation between Stu and the stranger that the stranger is more than just a random bar-fly. I’ll go through those in a moment, but first it should be noted that after Stu recovers from his accident, he returns to the bar and discovers the stranger was never seen before or since (53:10).

The stranger is more than just a random bar-fly, because he is Jesus. Let me show you why, before turning to show how this scene is consistent with my understanding of God speaking to us today, as discussed in the story of Gideon a few weeks ago.

The stranger knows a lot about Stu. He knows he has a long road ahead, and he knows intimate personal details too. While it sets Stu off at the time, the reality is no other stranger could legitimately claim to know these details. Sure, a drunk might claim to, but the bartender admits the stranger wasn’t drunk. It is worth noting in the scene immediately prior, Stu is at confession and complains, “The last thing I need is another father to fail for” (43:53). The stranger’s terms for Stu move from “Pal,” to “Son,” to “Kid,” concluding with the fatherly advice to not drive.

The stranger admits no one wants to listen to him. No one wants to listen to Jesus anymore. Even in the church at large, most would rather listen to Paul or John or later theologians than the Jesus of the gospels. If we listened to Jesus, there wouldn’t be talk of repealing the nineteenth amendment. We wouldn’t be dehumanizing immigrants. We wouldn’t be breaking the Law in order to “follow” the Law. We wouldn’t be ostracizing those who most need to be embraced by the love of Christ. We wouldn’t be protecting child abusers.

The stranger reacts to Stu’s comment about being “fucked up” by saying, “Someone beat you to it.” Jesus was crucified. This comment, and the stranger’s scarred face, are hints this direction.

The stranger tells Stu to be grateful despite all the reasons to be angry. He tells Stu that he’s been given a chance. This chance—despite being owed nothing—is the grace of the gospel that Jesus offers. Scripture is clear that we must give thanks (Ephesians 5:20; Colossians 3:17; 1 Thessalonians 5:18). If Scripture is Jesus’ words, then Jesus commands giving thanks.

Jesus Speaks Today

Now true, Jesus doesn’t always physically appear in the barstool next to us, or across the table at Starbucks, or in the booth at Taco Bell or McDonalds, but this doesn’t mean Jesus isn’t present, doesn’t want to speak to us, or isn’t actively speaking to us. I would posit he is and he does. If we’re always talking or engaging other inputs, it’s no wonder we don’t hear him.

Jesus doesn’t yell at us to get our attention. He doesn’t beat us over the head to get us to obey him. He is gentle and patient. And he is full of grace.

The Protestant Evangelical in me wants to say, “It can’t be Jesus in that scene, because he told Stu not to drive, and Stu disobeyed and drove. He deserved to die as a result.”

But let’s look back at Gideon. We established that God said Gideon could defeat Midian alone. This means that even with only 300, Gideon was disobeying God. But God didn’t kill Gideon in the battle as a result.

Similarly, Jesus told Stu not to drive, but he also started the conversation by saying, “You’re getting into the fine print on this way of living, pal” and “You got a long, weary road ahead.” Both of these indicate that struggle was coming, whether or not he obeyed that final injunction.

I mentioned in the Gideon post that God does not belittle and condemn. And this is true in Stu’s conversation with Jesus. Even when Stu insults and curses, Jesus responds graciously.

Come as You Are

As the movie plays, the honest dialogue between Jesus and Stu in the bar is continued in Stu’s prayers throughout his ongoing pain and struggle.

And that’s what I want to leave you with today. This is why I didn’t censor the curse words in their dialogue. God can handle your honesty. He can take your worst. Jesus literally died on the cross.

So come to him honestly. A lot of the time when we feel we have to come to God a certain way, it makes it harder to approach him at all. But God just wants us to come to him. Look at Psalm 88, 109, 137. Look at Jeremiah (especially chapters 1 and 20). These are the honest cries of people who knew God was big enough to handle their pain. They brought it to him, and God met them where they were at.

Come to him. Come as you are. Come as you feel. Watch him meet you. Hear him comfort and guide you.

I promise you he will!

In this with you.

Thanks for reading.